Secret Feelings
by Jacqueline Roget
Summary: Young Blades, scene from 'The Exile' for the character's POV.
1. Default Chapter

**Author's Note: Hey guys...just cleaned it up a bit. The format and all. Nothing major but if you wanna read again... My betas for this POV 3-parter were Heather and Milady De Winter. **

**Setting: Young Blades Episode #4 'The Exile' after d'Artagnan's rescue.**

D'Artagnan's POV

_King? He is the blasted King of England._ That thought makes me go numb and everything blurs. I feel the manservant cleaning my face. _HIS manservant_, I think numbly. I hear him ask me what I think of Jacqueline. _Think of her? What DO I think of her? She is courageous, strong, intelligent, keeps me on my toes…_

"She's a handful," I say aloud.

He laughs and adds, "Or two."

Jacqueline walks through the door as he finishes speaking, and my breath catches inside my lungs. This is the first time I have truly seen her as a woman and not a musketeer in disguise. Her long, curly hair looks soft and lovely and I resist the urge to touch it. Her face, I want to slide my hand across, and her lips… I look away and at the ground to avoid finishing that thought. I feel my face burn and hope it is not obvious.

"Hello, Jacqueline." I savor her name. "Where's your brother? Oh, he must be hiding; I forgot he's an outlaw now." _Way to go d'Artagnan that was real nice sounding._ Her face falls and she looks away. I feel a stab of guilt and instantly regret my harsh words.

"As are you," she replies coolly, eyes locking on mine strongly as I look away, guilt coming on again. _She hates me, way to go._

"You must come to England with us. Jacqueline is going to be my Queen." Panic seizes me. _Queen?_ I look at her, shocked; I feel my heart breaking into a million pieces. She looks away. I feel betrayed somehow. _But, I am ONLY the son of the legendary d'Artagnan, what is that to the King of England?_ She replies about not accepting yet, and I tune in again, hope surging slightly.

"Perhaps you love someone else?" Charles asks her mockingly, making my blood boil. _How dare he make fun of her?_ Her eyes lock onto mine again and the fear of giving my secret away, of her seeing how much I love her, causes me to break the contact and look away. I love her very much. I want her with me always but I know I cannot offer her anything. He can offer her freedom, and I cannot. For that reason, I keep my feelings hidden. _Besides, _I remind myself, _she made it clear how she feels about me._

"D'Artagnan, would you excuse us?" she asks. I do not want to go; I want to hear what she says to him. What she decides, but she asked, and so I obey without question, retreating to my front of sarcasm to hide the tears that are threatening to form.

"Come on, Clive, let's go pick some mushrooms," I say and look at her, savoring her beauty one last time as I can't help but wonder if my chance is gone of ever seeing her again.


	2. Jacqueline's POV

Jacqueline's POV

_Social climber?_ D'Artagnan's words echoed shamelessly through my mind. I felt hurt that he would accuse me of seeing this man, this King as a means to improve my social status. Anger seized me. _After all, did not I, we, just save his sorry self?_ Guilt replaced the anger. _Yeah Jacqueline, but it is your fault he was even in the dungeon. He was trying to protect you._ I never felt worse about anything in my life. D'Artagnan had kept my secret and helped me out. I stopped at the door still thinking when I heard Charles' voice.

"What do you think of her?" Curiosity caused me to wait and listen. _What does d'Artagnan think of me?_

"She's a handful," d'Artagnan replied.

"Or two," Charles laughingly added. Sadness at d'Artagnan's answer and anger at being laughed at by Charles made me wait no longer. As I quickly opened the door, both men turned to me, their eyes locking onto my body. D'Artagnan's eyes roamed me briefly, but intensely before, he looked down at his hands. _He has never looked at me that way before. Does he really think I look that pretty…He is blushing, I cannot believe it?_ Confusion came over me as I tried to discern his behavior and I shortly forgot Charles was even there.

"Hello Jacqueline," d'Artagnan said, looking at the floor. _It sounds wonderful when he says my name…Why is he not looking at me?_ "Where's your brother?" Panic crossed my face and I felt the color drain. "Oh, he must be hiding; I forgot he's an outlaw now." _He is angry, but why? No… he is jealous, the 'great' d'Artagnan is jealous…_Pride surged through me.

"As are you," I replied, raising my eyebrows and cocking my head slightly to the side to dare him to say more. Charles spoke up, and I wondered how much he would notice of the exchange.

"You must come to England with us; Jacqueline is going to be my Queen." He said it proudly, as if bragging. Embarrassment and anger filled me. _How dare he assume? How dare he do that in front of d'Artagnan?_ I could see the shock and betrayal on d'Artagnan's face; his jaw was practically on the floor. _Could he care for me so?_ My heart wanted to believe that was so. I quickly responded.

"…Your majesty I don't recall accepting." The response I knew was automatic, not to mention I was watching d'Artagnan so closely, I did not know what I said really. D'Artagnan looked back up at me, his face changing over to hope and relief. _Why do I care if he thinks I am marrying Charles? Is it any of his business?_ My mind was in a raging battle over my heart. Charles did not like my response or d'Artagnan's reaction.

He mockingly retorted, "Perhaps you love someone else?" Both of us instantly looked at d'Artagnan, who looked back down at the floor. _Love d'Artagnan? Impossible or is it?_ The battle continued. Realization hit me. I DID love d'Artagnan. All the retorts and insults were a way of denying it. _Charles knows what I did not. He knows my secret that not even d'Artagnan knows. _I thought numbly. Charles was a King, a good man, a respectable one. D'Artagnan was arrogant, but loyal, trustworthy. _But, d'Artagnan and I could never be, and he will not leave France._ The battle for my heart between the two was over.

"D'Artagnan, would you excuse us?" I asked as my heart broke. I could see him fighting back emotions and he did it the only way he knew how, with sarcasm.

"Come on Clive, let's go pick some mushrooms," he answered. He looked at me one last time as if branding my image into his mind so he would not forget me, and then he walked out, taking my heart with him. I turned back to Charles, wondering if I would ever see d'Artagnan again.


	3. Charles' POV

CHARLES' POV

I stood watching the young man, my suspicions circling in my head.

"You know Jacque's sister?" I asked watching his reaction closely.

"Jacqueline? I've met her," he replied, without even blinking.

"What do you think of her?" I asked, hoping for more of a reaction this time. He hesitated and I knew I had caught something.

"She's a handful." _He avoided eye contact; he is lying, that is not how he feels._

"Or two," I laughingly added. Jacqueline walked through the door then, causing us to both turn toward her, and I went over to see her.

"Hello Jacqueline. Where's your brother?" D'Artagnan asked her, bitterness was in his voice. I could hear it. _There is something going on here. More than a casual, 'I've met her'._ "Oh, he must be hiding, I forgot he's an outlaw now," he finished.

"As are you," Jacqueline replied coldly. _He is in love with her, yes! That is what it is._ My thoughts turned to confusion. _But how?_ My thoughts turned to d'Artagnan's rescue earlier. 'Jacque's' insistence we rescue him; d'Artagnan's insistence he could handle the two guards himself. 'Jacque', Jacqueline, looking so much alike. It hit me like a ton of bricks and I wondered how I could have been so blind. _Jacque and Jacqueline are one and the same. That is how she has escaped capture. She is in disguise as a man, a musketeer. _Anger at d'Artagnan surfaced. _She trusted this boy with her secret, but not me? Why?_

"You must come to England with us," I said to him, steeling a look at Jacqueline before turning back to d'Artagnan and finishing. "Jacqueline is going to be my Queen." Shock, betrayal, and heartbreak showed instantly on d'Artagnan's face vividly. _Yes boy, she is mine! You cannot have her! You know you can offer her nothing. I am King Charles the second of England; I offer her freedom and all of England._

"… Don't recall accepting." Jacqueline finished and I focused back on her. Hope was plainly written on d'Artagnan's face. I fumed inwardly. _Why did she do that? Unless…_

"Perhaps you love someone else?" I asked. We both turned to d'Artagnan who avoided her gaze. It was enough. She may not have said it but she confirmed it without the use of words. _No! I must not loose her!_ I screamed inside my head.

"D'Artagnan would you excuse us?" she asked him, and he followed her request like a true gentleman though it was clear he wanted to stay.

"Come on Clive, let's go pick some mushrooms," he said, scars am clear in his tone. He walked past us, stopping briefly to glance once at Jacqueline. _How dare he look at her like that!_ Jacqueline looked at him too, sadly, as if she knew that would be the last time she saw him. _She picked me!_ My joy was momentary though, as another thought set in. _She wants him though!_ The little voice inside my head told me to quit complaining. Whatever the reason, I had won and she is mine! She would love me and be Queen of England as she should be. I focused back on her, willing myself to listen and prepared to meet any request she asked of me.


End file.
